Classic · Journey to the West · Wu Cheng’en (original) · VoiceSmiths adaptation · 1592 · 4:56

The Dragon King’s Treasure

The Monkey King raids the Dragon Palace for a weapon. All too light, until a glowing iron pillar starts to shrink. Same cast as the Chinese episode.

StorytellerSun Wukong, the Monkey KingThe Four Old MonkeysThe MonkeysThe Sea Patrol YakshaAo Guang, Dragon King of the Eastern SeaThe Dragon QueenThe Dragon Kings of the South, West and North

StorytellerOn the Mountain of Flowers and Fruit, the Monkey King ruled forty-seven thousand monkeys, and the demon kings of seventy-two caves bowed before him. But one day he frowned.Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingYou all have weapons that suit you. But this sword of mine is clumsy. It’s just not me. What am I going to do?StorytellerFour old monkeys stepped forward.The Four Old MonkeysGreat King, no ordinary weapon is good enough for an immortal. Under our iron bridge, the water runs all the way to the Dragon Palace of the Eastern Sea. Go and ask the old Dragon King.Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingWater can’t drown me. I’m off!StorytellerHe plunged into the waves, and the sea opened before him, all the way to the bottom. There a yaksha on patrol blocked his path.The Sea Patrol YakshaHey! You, pushing the water around! Who are you?Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingI am Sun Wukong, the Heaven-born Sage. I’m your Dragon King’s next-door neighbor. How come you don’t know me?The Sea Patrol YakshaYour Majesty! There’s a Heaven-born Sage outside, Sun Wukong. He says he’s your neighbor!StorytellerAo Guang, Dragon King of the Eastern Sea, hurried out with his shrimp soldiers and crab generals.Ao Guang, Dragon King of the Eastern SeaCome in, immortal sir, come in!Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingMy good neighbor! I need a weapon, and I hear you live in a palace of jade and pearl. You must have a spare one. I’ve come to ask.StorytellerThe Dragon King could hardly say no. A mandarin-fish captain brought out a great broadsword.Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingI don’t do swords.StorytellerThen the eel strongmen carried in a nine-pronged fork. Wukong gave it a few swings and put it down.Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingLight. Light, light. Doesn’t feel right.Ao Guang, Dragon King of the Eastern SeaSir, that fork weighs three thousand six hundred pounds!StorytellerNext, a bream admiral and a carp general staggered in with a painted halberd, seven thousand two hundred pounds of it. Wukong twirled it and stuck it in the floor.Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingStill light. Light, light, light.Ao Guang, Dragon King of the Eastern SeafearfulBut that’s the heaviest thing in my palace! There’s nothing else!Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingA Dragon King, out of treasure? Go and look again. I’ll pay whatever it’s worth.StorytellerThen the Dragon Queen slipped out from behind a screen.The Dragon QueenwhispersHusband, he’s no small fry. That magic iron in our treasury, the one that holds down the Milky Way, has been glowing for days. Maybe it’s been waiting for him.Ao Guang, Dragon King of the Eastern SeaThat old thing? It’s just the post Yu the Great used to measure the seas.The Dragon QueenNever mind if he can use it. Give it to him, and get him out of here!StorytellerDeep in the vault, ten thousand rays of gold lit the dark. There stood an iron pillar, thick as a barrel and over twenty feet tall. Wukong grabbed it with both hands.Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingToo thick, too long. A bit shorter and thinner, and I could use it.StorytellerAnd the pillar shrank. A gold band at each end, black iron between, and the words: “The As-You-Will Gold-Banded Staff. Thirteen thousand five hundred pounds.”Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingAs-You-Will! A little thinner still. Perfect!StorytellerHe whirled it through the Crystal Palace until the old Dragon King shook, the turtles pulled in their heads and the fish hid. Then he sat down on the throne.Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingThank you, neighbor. Only now I’ve nothing to wear that matches. A suit of armor, perhaps?Ao Guang, Dragon King of the Eastern SeaArmor? I’m afraid we don’t have any.Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingOne guest shouldn’t trouble two hosts. If you don’t have it, I’m not leaving.Ao Guang, Dragon King of the Eastern SeaTruly, there’s none.Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingmenacingReally? Then let me try this iron out on you!Ao Guang, Dragon King of the Eastern SeaNo, no! My brothers will have some! I’ll beat the drum and ring the bell, and they’ll come at once!StorytellerThe drum was beaten, the bell was rung, and the Dragon Kings of the other three seas came rushing in.The Dragon Kings of the South, West and NorthangryA monkey robbing our brother? Let’s call up the troops!Ao Guang, Dragon King of the Eastern SeaDon’t even say it! One touch of that iron and you’re dead!The Dragon Kings of the South, West and NorthThen give him the armor, send him off, and we’ll complain to Heaven.StorytellerSo they gave him cloud-walking shoes, golden chain mail and a purple-gold cap with phoenix wings. Wukong put it all on, swung his staff, and marched out.Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingmockingSo sorry for all the trouble!StorytellerHe shot up out of the water by the iron bridge, without a drop on him, shining gold from head to foot.The MonkeysGreat King! How splendid! How splendid!StorytellerThe monkeys rushed to lift the staff. It would not budge.The MonkeysGood heavens! How did you ever carry it?Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingStand back. Small! Small! Small!StorytellerIt shrank to a needle, and he tucked it in his ear.The MonkeysTake it out again! Let’s see!Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingBig! Big! Big!StorytellerThen he ran out, bent at the waist, and shouted:Sun Wukong, the Monkey KingshoutingGrow!StorytellerAnd he grew ten thousand feet tall, the staff reaching up to the thirty-third heaven and down to the bottom of hell. Every demon king on the mountain fell on his face. Then, in a flash, he was his own size again, the staff was a needle in his ear, and he strolled home.

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